Think You Know What Perseverance Is? Read This Before You Say Yes.

True Perseverance: The Art of Pushing Forward When Everything Tells You to Quit

Persevering in a highly competitive world is paramount to success in whatever we do in life. While pursuing goals, I sometimes see challenges as fleeting rather than barriers, but once I recognize them as obstacles, my resolve strengthens. Growing up as a deaf child, I built resilience in navigating the hearing world, and with a child-like enthusiasm, I continue to focus on long-term goals without hesitation.

Central is persistence and willpower. Failure is unavoidable, but my response decides whether I push forward or divert. In all fields of competition, which have expanded drastically, perseverance is more important now than ever. Sustaining a positive attitude towards bumps in the road, keeping my objectives clear, and strategizing are vital in approaching letdowns. Cultivating perseverance will include planning the process (not a journey, for that is too ambiguous!), meditating on it, and regarding all factors before ensuring triumph.

When I was an actor in New York City, I did not notice until a teacher challenged my process that I should not give up so readily. I had no idea I was! I thought it was because I was not clever or talented, but upon brooding on his meaning, NO! To not give up is to ignore the first signs of hardships, not blame outside circumstances for my defeats, and have the resilience to push on. In the past, I cycled through unfulfillment and regret.

In studying how to become mentally efficient, I observed four building blocks of perseverance:

1. Tenacity

2. Composure

3. Patience

4. Focused activity

When I do not get an appointment after days of cold calling, it wears down on me mentally, making me disbelieve, "What is the point?" I confess that my tenacity is vulnerable. It returns to self-esteem, built in the first 7 years of a child's life. However, there is nothing I can do about that because one would have to go as far as the second trimester of my mother's womb, but what I can do is keep swinging at the plate. The purpose—my reason for driving onward—must continuously stay in focus to keep me moving.

Composure does not come naturally to me. I do have my vices. Sometimes, I would let an aggressive driver irritate me, and I would become competitive for all the wrong reasons to prove a point or to outdo them, which is not a good look on my part. When I watch Tom Brady in the playoffs or moments of crisis in a game, I respect his sense of calm, a trait I try to emulate every chance. Perfection is not what I seek, but a continual self-improvement towards being better in that arena.

Patience comes naturally to me, given I grew up relatively poor, not having much and having low expectations as a child. I recall a time, after soccer practice, when my grandmother's early '80s Maverick, with the paint removed and a hole in the passenger front seat, broke down so far from home (before the cell phone days); I was devastated, demoralized and afraid as well as chilly. It was late Fall evening. She found a pay phone at a nearby office building; when done, we sat on the steps of the building; she pulled out a newspaper and some unsalted Saltine crackers and chomped on them, hiding her pain, so I imagined. I discovered I could pass the time by doing what I could control.

There would be some focused activity, but it would come to me as a burst of motivation or passion. For instance, when I was making my first hip-hop album, I spent a lot of nights creating beats and writing lyrics to record in my makeshift studio in a shared apartment in Washington, DC, because I enjoyed it more than studying or doing my homework. It was not easy, yet I appreciated the process so much that it did not feel like work. It was a great escape and one of the proudest achievements of my life. These instances in the past were far and few in between. It's not as consistent as it could have been.

When I started surrounding myself with high-performance individuals, whether via YouTube or Biographies, I noticed that determination is a critical trait for entrepreneurs. Their wins and/or losses depend on whether they can power through uncertainty and setbacks. I realized that failing fast is essential, learning quicker and plowing ahead, regardless. Reading True Perseverance in The Impediments to Perseverance, I noticed some outdated ideas that don't fully apply today. After all, Funk & Wagnalls published the writings in the early 20th century. For instance, overcoming obstacles through sheer will might not align with the modern sense of work-life balance and mental health for some. Still for me, I am committed to paying the price of not having a work-life balance in attaining my dreams, but the mental health bit is significant to note. My enemies of perseverance, which I have suffered greatly at the hands of, are as follows:

• Laziness

• Discouragement

• Lack of confidence in my abilities

• Impatience

• Superficiality

Inadvertently and, more often, deliberately, I implanted in my mind the hatred of effort and would make excuses not to do anything but the easiest of things, doing the minimum of effort and involving myself with a minimum of complex thinking, inducing myself second rate in merit. As a past victim of laziness, I was filled with negative qualities, meaning any victory I would gain never stayed with me long.

I used to get crushed quite easily, for I did not see obstacles as nothing less than a stimulus and the admiration of the struggle to continue on the process that leads to success. My courage would waver, and I lose heart at every single failure, which retarded the intent of my aims. I did this when I did not get enough passengers to drive. Listening to songs from my albums or making sales calls caused more anguish.

Pessimism is due to my lack of self-esteem and not recognizing my self-worth. These painful experiences are always effects of this when I would have been better off reflecting and correcting instead of sulking. As I got older and maintained myself with the right type of people, I began to believe more in myself and continually consolidate this trait in my mind.

I can recall so many times I curtailed the development of a project only to abandon it for whatever reason—whether I was overwhelmed, overextended, or lacked focus. It all came down to my impatience for wanting success to come NOW. I know now that it does not always go that way. Impatience is the antithesis of perseverance!

Lastly, I dart here and there, trying to complete so much at once, making trials of trifles and never fixing my mind on a single purpose. My curiosity would spur me from crucial projects to rush headlong into others. I dropped whatever I was doing and changed up frequently. Once I run into an obstacle, I become indifferent, and soon after, I get disheartened. Without finding a way to combat this ailment, I fling into some other thing and do not see my superficiality, for my life was just a constant series of new starts, and I never reap the fruits of success. I never pushed far enough to be truly defeated, but I drifted from project to project, popping before I could make real headway—like soap bubbles in the wind.

I have learned throughout studying the first chapter that I have the energy to strive. After all, I still have my youth. I must find every possible means to put the information acquired into deep practice and not forget that laser beam focus compels success. It is akin to a scientist who makes changes to his experiments through observations. None of this will happen unless I apply what I learn from trying to be perseverant and form the qualities that are, in reality, my weaknesses. From then on, I can become braver and more patient and make nearly impossible those bummers and worries that continually pound me when I forget to have faith in myself.

I began applying what I learned with something simple: ridesharing, 7 days a week, 50+ hours, a form of persistence and focused activity. When dealing with aggressive drivers and unnecessary honking, I implemented breathing exercises. I think of when Tom Brady was down several touchdowns and tried to visualize what he would do. When the demand was slow, especially in the summer, when schools were closed.

I thought of my grandmother's patience and found something productive to do, such as practicing speaking Spanish with my audio.

If you struggle with these, meditate on where you want to evolve and make small, consistent efforts. They won't come overnight, but I guarantee you will be much better off tomorrow than you were yesterday. You may overcome quickly, and you may not, but you won't fail if you try, no matter how long or hard it is. As a fan of Aesop's Fables, I reminisce on "The Hare and the Tortoise." The turtle wasn't fast, but he was relentless. And that's what wins the race—every time.

Which strengths or weaknesses are you trying to overcome, and how is the process going for you?

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